As Facebook will tell you today, I’ve been lucky enough to spend 40 years on this magnificent planet.
Yesterday, I decided to create a list of the 40 things I’ve learned over the last 4 decades, as a way to remind myself of what’s important in life.
Here it is – My 40 Lessons in 40 Years:
1. You can’t escape your fate.
Fate is a concept I’m fascinated with, and one I’ve learned (sometimes the hard way) to accept for what it is.
What is written is written, and so it will be. Amor Fati, as per Nietzsche; Hukam, as per the Sikh scriptures.
Call it what you may, but understand that it’s unavoidable, so accept it with a smile and brave it with determination.
2. Early mornings are magical.
There’s a reason why many belief systems stress the value of the period before sunrise; it’s a time of serenity & peace.
To rise early is not easy, nor should it be, but it’s your divine right.
3. Grief can destroy you, or it can take you to places you never imagined.
From the deepest pits of despair come the most inspirational stories of hope.
Your devastation at what happened to you holds within it a unique experience and perspective that when harnessed, can change your life.
4. Everyone has a lesson to teach you.
Throughout the course of our lives, we’ll meet countless people. Each of them has a story, a life experience, advice or lesson that we can apply in our own lives.
Unfortunately, we’re usually too busy judging them to realize this.
5. Gratitude is paramount.
There are so many people in this world living in utter despair, yet they continue to have hope and dream of a better future.
Conversely, there are so many people in this world who have everything they need, yet keep wanting more, unable to realize how fortunate they truly are.
It’s important to be grateful for what you have, not envious for what you don’t.
6. Writing is therapy.
I’m thankful to have rediscovered my love for writing over the last few years. I’ve come to realize that writing has provided me with an outlet few things can compare to.
7. Reading is a gift you should give yourself as often as you can.
To say I love books in an understatement.
I’ve watched Maharaja Ranjit Singh establish his empire; stood next to Malcom X as he called out racism in the United States; sat next to Nelson Mandela in his jail cell on Robben Island; witnessed Musashi become a legend in feudal Japan, and cheered ringside while witnessing Muhammad Ali float like a butterfly and sting like a bee – all thanks to books.
8. You can’t please everyone.
Not everyone will root for you.
Not everyone will like you.
Not everyone will be happy to see you doing well.
It took me a long time to accept this, but once I did, it felt as though a burden had been lifted off my shoulders.
9. Silence is golden.
We live in an age of extreme busyness. From the moment we wake up to the moment we go to bed, we are swamped with things to do. Our minds are under constant assault from worries, to-do lists and anxieties.
Simply closing my eyes for a few minutes and relishing the silence has helped me slow down.
10. We’re more alike than different.
Each of has a uniqueness that makes us who we are, but in this age of individuality, we tend to forget that we have a lot more in common with others than we think. When I began to view others based on our similarities rather than our differences, my life started to change.
11. Saying you’re religious and actually following what your faith says are two different things.
I am by no means an expert on any religious text, but from all I’ve read to date, I can safely say that very few people in this world practice what the scriptures they hold in such high regard state.
Divinity exists in these works, yet ignorance prevails in most that read them.
12. Words have immense power.
It’s important to chose your words carefully, for they can do damage that is irreversible.
13. Look past the surface.
Behind every facade you see is a person with flaws, fears and worries, just like you.
Don’t be fooled by the flash, cash, fame and words.
They’re all human, no different than you and I.
14. Everything you need is inside.
There is an indescribable power within each of us, yet we occupy ourselves looking for it everywhere else.
15. Do the right thing – because it’s at the right thing.
Do things because doing them is the right course of action, instead of for the praise or reward that may get as a result.
16. Accept nothing as fact.
You’re an intelligent being, yet you willfully keep believing things that deep down inside, you know are nonsense. Tradition, custom and the way things are should always be questioned and analyzed. If they’re true, they’ll withstand the scrutiny.
17. Each of us is a leader.
Regardless of your willingness to accept the title, you’re a leader. Someone is looking to you for guidance, for inspiration, for motivation. It’s a responsibility you should never take lightly.
18. Help everyone, even those you don’t like.
There are people in life that no matter what, you’re going to dislike, and that’s ok. With that said, a hallmark of living a good life is to help someone in their time of need, regardless of your differences.
19. Time is your most precious resource.
You wouldn’t hand your hard-earned money to imbeciles, yet you devote your time to them without a second thought.
That’s a problem.
20. Your opinion isn’t needed on every topic.
A fool is he who thinks he is qualified to give his opinion on matters he knows nothing about.
21. You have a sacred duty to remember where you come from.
It’s a tragedy of the gravest proportion when one willfully turns their back on who they are and where they come from.
To deliberately ignore and forget who you are is an insult of immense proportion to those who came before you.
22. You wield the pen.
One of the most liberating realizations one can have is that in the story of your life, you are the lone author.
Despite your suffering, despite all the pain & anguish you may have experienced, the story can still be a positive one.
23. Comfort is a killer.
It’s important to constantly challenge yourself, for stagnation is a disease. A big fish in a small pond relishes in its domination, not realizing its comfort is slowly killing it.
24. Be a voice for the voiceless.
The world is full of people who are subject to immense injustice, with no one willing to help them.
Have the courage to speak when you see a wrong, even if no one else is. The world needs more people who are willing to do the right thing.
25. Beware of experts.
No person in this world has it figured out, so don’t be fooled by such claims. There is no such thing as an expert; each of us is making mistakes, growing and learning as we go.
26. Make time for those that matter.
The time spent with those you love is more valuable than the rarest of jewels.
No matter how busy you are, you’ve got to make time for those you hold dear.
27. On your way up, help others.
In a world so focused on getting ahead at all costs, be someone who chooses to step back to help others along.
28. Humility is a superpower.
Humility is a key that unlocks many doors, which arrogance can slam shut forever.
29. Let go of hatred.
Hatred is poison.
It will destroy you if you let it, which is why it is important to learn how to let go and move on.
30. Failures hold lessons.
I’ve learned more from my losses than I have from my wins. Losing sucks, but there is always something to be gained from each defeat.
31. Be kind.
Kindness and sincerity are gifts we can give to others with every interaction.
A word of encouragement will cost you nothing, yet may make a world of difference in someone’s life.
32. Play your part
Each of has a part to play in making the world better.
We need to stop waiting for politicians to make decisions and others to take the first steps.
Take charge and be the change you wish to see.
33. Give more than you take.
Lead a life of service.
You were put here to give, not to take.
Yes, making a living is important, but increased numbers in your bank account should not come at the cost of a decline in your decency and humanity.
34. Titles are meaningless.
Titles suit books, not people.
Never forget you’re a person, no matter how lofty the words before your name are.
35. We’re all born twice.
Fate has allotted each of us two births.
The first occurs when we emerge from our mother’s womb and take our first breath.
The second occurs when we find our true purpose for being here.
The first occurs by nature, the second must be sought.
36. Be Present.
Being present is a priceless gift you can give yourself and those around you.
The past is done; the future uncertain; now is all that matters.
37. Be the good guy.
Just because the good guy doesn’t always win doesn’t mean you shouldn’t want to be the good guy.
38. Look for beauty.
There is beauty everywhere in this world, but sometimes we refuse to take off the glasses of negativity so we can see it.
39. Happiness is a birthright.
We’re here fore such a short period of time, yet so much of it is consumed by worry, anxiety and stress. It doesn’t have to be that way.
40. There’s an ending.
One day, it will all be over.
Your life will come to an end.
This shouldn’t be something that gives way to dread, but rather as motivation to enjoy the precious time you have.
40 lessons – 40 years. Thank you all for the birthday wishes!
